How to Start the ASSFACE Diet — A Beginner’s Guide

You don’t need a reset—you just need a strategy.

If you’re new to the ASSFACE Diet, first of all, welcome! This isn’t some crash diet that leaves you starving and frustrated. It’s a flexible, no-nonsense way of eating that helps you ditch added sugar, focus on real foods, and actually stick with it.

And the best part? You can start right now—no prep and no perfection needed.

ASSFACE Jack, the ASSFACE Diet Mascot

Step 1: Learn what ASSFACE stands for (and read our blog to learn how to start a diet)

Let’s break it down:

• Added

• Sugar

• Sucks

• Fruits and veggies

• Also contain

• Carbs

• Eat those!

You’ll focus on eating whole, nutrient-dense foods while eliminating added sugar and highly processed carbs.

You'll then eat more fruits and veggies to replace those highly processed carbs. ASSFACE tends to kind of naturally balance the diet with enough proteins and fats, as once a person eats less processed crap, they usually want to enjoy more foods like chicken, steak, fish, tofu, beans, cheese, other dairy, and healthy oils/solids! And, thankfully with ASSFACE, dairy, legumes, and artificial sweeteners are allowed, making the ASSFACE lifestyle a lot easier to stick with over the long term.

Our blog has ample articles and resources that will help you learn about how diets work

Step 2: Clean Out the Added Sugar

Start by checking labels. Look for sneaky sugars like:

• Cane sugar

• High fructose corn syrup

• Dextrose, sucrose, or syrup of any kind

• Honey or agave (even if it’s “natural”)

Toss or donate anything with added sugar—especially in items like dressings, sauces, bars, and yogurts. After a few months, you'll become an added-sugar pro, and you'll be able to know what has added sugar and what doesn't almost by instinct.

Step 3: Restock with ASSFACE-Friendly Foods

Here’s a solid starting grocery list:

• Proteins: Eggs, chicken (I love the pre-cooked deli rotisserie chickens), tuna, ground turkey, beef, salmon, Greek yogurt (plain), cottage cheese

• Veggies: Frozen, canned, or fresh broccoli, spinach, kale, bell peppers, green beans

• Fruits: Berries, apples, bananas, melons, oranges

• Legumes: Black beans, chickpeas, lentils

• Healthy Fats: Olive oil, ghee, coconut oil, nuts, seeds, avocado, full-fat mozzarella and cheddar cheeses

• Grab-and-Go: P3 packs, jerky (no added sugar), bagged salad, Real Good frozen meals, string cheese

Step 4: Build Simple Meals with the ASSFACE Formula

Each meal should include:

• A protein (chicken, beans, eggs, etc.)

• Veggies or fruit

• A healthy fat (cheese, olive oil, avocado)

• No added sugar or refined carbs

Example meal:

Grilled chicken over corn with black beans, cheese, salsa, and guac

Example meal 2:

Baked lemon butter salmon with a side of spinach

Example meal 3:

Lean ham, scrambled eggs with full-fat cheddar, plus tomatoes on the side

Step 5: Use the 80/20 Rule for Long-Term Success

You don’t have to be perfect. The 80/20 rule means you follow the plan 80% of the time, and leave 20% for life—special events, dining out, cheat days, and the occasional treat.

Note about the 80/20 rule: We suggest following the diet 100% when you are just starting out. This allows you to make the lifestyle change and get used to it. Once you feel fully comfortable with the change (which usually takes between 4-6 months for most, but it can take up to a year), you can begin using the 80/20 rule from that point until...well, indefinitely.

Step 6: Track Your Progress (If You Want)

You don’t have to count calories on ASSFACE, but you can track:

• Your energy levels

• Your moods

• How your clothes fit

• Your cravings for sugar (and watch them fade)

Final Tip: Keep It Simple and Keep Going

You don’t need to prep fancy meals or cut out entire food groups. Just ditch the added sugar, eat real food, and build a way of eating that actually works for your life.